"So hang on, you're saying that you could go to a house party, meet a girl, find her attractive, talk to her for five or ten minutes, talk to other girls later on, realise in retrospect that she was your preferred girl of the evening, realise that she'd left before you could ask her for her number, but still not ask the host or hostess of the party for her number, even though you would have loved to see her again and you know for 100% certain that they could get her number for you?"
"Yes."
"So you could go to a party, completely fancy a girl, give her the signals that you fancy her, and then not follow up on it, even though you'd totally wanted to see her again?"
"Yes."
"So a guy could have gone to a party, completely fancied me, given me the signals that he fancied me, and then not followed up on it, even though he'd definitely wanted to see me again?"
"Yes."
"Oh."
Why did the girl leave?
ReplyDeleteDid he get your name? If so, then this is where facebook comes in so handy - he can hunt you down on that.
ReplyDeleteHow well does he know the host/hostess of the party? If he doesn't know him/her very well, he might be embarrassed to ask - involving a third party and all that. Lots of guys would be.
You may have been the preferred girl of the evening, but maybe he has other pokers in the fire elsewhere?
Just a few thoughts.
@Anon1 - in this hypothetical situation, she just left for the same reason anyone left a party - she was tired, she'd had enough to drink etc. - maybe she waved goodbye at him, maybe there were a lot of people and she couldn't find him, whatever, they'd had a good chat, and then she left.
ReplyDelete@Anon2 - this isn't one situation, genuinely, and it's not just about me. I've just seen male friends of mine who normally can't organise their way around a Londis, even total stoners or the most shy, lacklustre individuals, who suddenly, when faced with a girl they like, become the most impressively focused and determined people on earth, like a dog with a bone - maybe they don't have the guts to ask her for her number, but they always get it eventually, somehow. So I've always assumed that, if a guy doesn't ask for my number, he doesn't fancy me. Last night, someone told me that that wasn't the case. It was interesting. I came home a bit the worse for wear and decided to record this in case it could comfort other females who'd been similarly misinformed.
Anon 2 says:
ReplyDeleteI am sorry to hear that. You have been most grievously misinformed. I am a guy who is not a shrinking wallflower by any stretch of the imagination. And yet I often find it hard to ask girls for their number. Firstly, it just feels a bit cliched and unoriginal (I know that's overthinking it). And, secondly, the more you like the girl, the harder it becomes.
Thanks for the follow-up, Anon 2. Like I said, I think it was always the shock of seeing male friends of mine who had been painfully useless in every department, who couldn't be bothered to, say, organise a pub gathering for their bosom buddies on their birthdays, but who suddenly found the confidence and strength to organise a night out at a top London eaterie in order to entice a fit girl.
ReplyDeleteAnyway. As I've learned many times in many ways, not all boys are the same. And for that, I am truly thankful. Keep up the good work.