Well done: you've reached 29.9% of your target!

With my breathlessly social, fun-packed existence, I'm sure it will be a struggle to believe that I ever partake in anything as humdrum as watching television. Yet in the past few weeks, I have somehow made room in my hectic schedule for a programme called, catchily, 'Did They Pay Off Their Mortgage In Two Years?'. Once past the uninspiring title, the show is actually fairly motivating, illustrating how people can free themselves from the burden of their mortgage by throwing themselves into a nightmareish two year battle of saving and increased earning.

But last week's episode was one of the most depressing pieces of television I've seen in months. The show's focus was a young family living in the north of England. The mother was unremarkable, with a dramatically fluctuating waistline which drew my sympathy. The small children seemed normal and happy. It was the father of this unit who aggravated me to red-faced frustration. Full of false promises and mediocre intentions, over two years he initiated ridiculous scheme after absurdly hopeless suggestion to contribute to his family's savings. Instead of staying at his regular job in a high street bank, he resigned and took an expensive course in Neuro-Linguistic Programming, planning to hold Give Up Smoking seminars. But inevitably, he failed to give any successful seminars, instead blowing more money on tragic error-packed leaflets and stands at trade fairs where he was reduced to giving brochures to babies in pushchairs. Meanwhile, his (still employed) wife's weight ballooned following a miscarriage and, with staggering insensitivity, the husband managed to blame this incident for the next six months of his layabout lifestyle, while she continued to work.

The real villain of the programme, however, was not the disappointing husband but the show's jovial presenter. Rene, pictured left, is a self-appointed financial 'guru'. He had clearly believed that it would be possible for the family to clear their £108,000-worth of mortgage and debts within two years. By the end of the experiment, they'd managed a paltry £32,000, well under a third of their target. But in the spirit of the age, the spineless presenter was unable to reprimand, instead summing up the couple's miserable efforts as 'brilliant' and saying they should be very proud of what they'd achieved. Sure, saving £32K over two years is no mean feat - but the programme wasn't about watching people put a bit aside, and it wasn't called 'Save Up Some Money Over The Course Of A Few Months'.

Fundamentally, they had failed spectacularly, but they weren't allowed to feel like failures - instead, the programme's goals had to be shifted to a place where mortgage repayments were no longer the focus: what was important that They Had Tried A Little Bit. In an embarrassing end-of-show summary, they desperately lapped up the presenter's patronising congratulations with pathetic gratitude. Worst of all was the possibility that others would have seen the same programme and been persuaded that there was anything worthy of praise in the family's meagre efforts. Tsk. Clearly my Thatcherite upbringing has worn off more than previously realised.