A Little Perspect(ive)

Last night, I was watching American Idol instead of going to the Fionn Regan gig, because I am still the illest person ever, and not in the Beastie Boys sense, annoyingly, although possibly I am both. Anyway, it was the end of Hollywood Week and the remaining 46 hopefuls were being whittled down to a final 24, painful interview by painful interview. And they'd walk into the room where the four judges were sitting, and Ryan Seacrest would do some absurdly hyperbolic voiceover about how this was the biggest day... of their lives... ever... in the history... of American television... and possibly Western civilization, and they would sit down and the judges would say something banal(e?) like, "So dawg, how you holdin' up?" and the contestant would start to cry, and say, "You know, it's really tough," and the judges would nod and say, "I know, it is really tough. It's been a tough year," and the contestant would nod and sniff and say, "I mean, the competition is so strong, and I felt like -" sniff "-I gave it my best shot, but... you know, it's just so hard. The pressure... This is, like, the hardest thing I've ever done." And I'm hoarse and grumpy and shouting at the TV saying, "RAGE! You are skinny and privileged, your hair is glossy, you have no visible spots, and you are down to the final 40 in American Idol Season 9, so I'm guessing you can carry a tune. If you think THIS is hard, try... ALMOST ANYTHING ELSE." I mean, obviously the Johannesburg slums or rural China would be a bit of a shock, or living with a physical disability, or a criminal record, or a family member with a heroin addiction... Or confronting a genuine phobia, or dealing with constant racial abuse or bullying.... You get the point. What was so frustrating was the judges' complicity in all this, as they nodded sagely in their black leather swivel chairs while the youngsters boo-hooed in front of them, wearing Abercrombie and carrying shiny guitars and 160 Gb iPods. Grumble grumble. Then today I woke up and I knew that I had to go to work, even though I'm still, like, so ill, and I'm not joking when I say that it was, literally, the hardest thing that anyone's ever done. Sniff.