GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

And again: GRRRRRRRRRRR. I am grumpy today about EVERYTHING and it is DEFINITELY YOUR FAULT.

Actually, it is my fault. I had way more white wine last night than I've had for a while and, fun though it was at the time, I am not happy about it now. I have been merrily healthy for the past however long, but today I cannot stop dreaming of pizza and garlic bread and it is no fun at all because I can't have what I want unless I am prepared to undo all my hard work which I don't want. So by getting what I want, I will also get what I don't want. This seems to me to be particularly cruel.

Plus in the past week I have had not one, not two, not three, but FOUR sex dreams involving boys I know in real life, none of whom I've ever seen 'in that way' before, except the one last night who I used to kind of flirt with but now he is married and the whole thing was really quite stressful what with him committing adultery etc. and really, it is getting rather tiresome waking up and finding that all that palaver was over nothing and that I'm still sprawled out diagonally across my big bed wearing a faded blue T-shirt from a club in Zanzibar, and not languorously spooning SOME RANDOM NAKED ACQUAINTANCE.

And then I got to work specially on time today, which is no mean feat on a normal day but a Victoria-Cross-winning effort this morning when I felt like someone had painted my eyes with white emulsion, because Elbow's fan site had sent me an email yesterday saying that they were putting some special tickets on sale at 9am this morning for a hush hush fans-only warm-up gig in March, to be held at a tiny venue in Cambridge, so at 09:00 hours I clicked the link and requested two tickets, and got through to the next page and entered my details at breakneck speed, name, address, email, card number, the works, and then pressed enter, and it said there was an error and took me back to the homepage, so I was like, stay calm, Janey, stay calm, and I reselected two tickets and painstakingly entered all my details again and pressed enter, and it said there was an error again, and took me back to the homepage, and then I went back to the gig listing, and it was sold out. At 09:04. And I was like, NOT FAIR. And then I spent about a zillion minutes trying to find the customer services email so that I could complain to them about their irritating and surely ILLEGAL system that allows OTHER PEOPLE to buy tickets but not me, even though I got up especially early and with a HANGOVER. And I finally got through to someone on the phone and they gave me the email address, and I started typing the email and then I just thought, 'Oh, you know what? It doesn't matter.' And I deleted the draft and moved on to dreaming about macaroni cheese.

But despite the irritating fallout, last night's masked gathering was really fun, involving a lot of giggling and not many masks, which is how I'd imagined it. I did go to Angel's beforehand and bought two amazing facial accessories - I will see if I can post a photo of myself in the more flamboyant one, on the understanding that I am still anonymous in LLFF. I also tried on a dark haired wig, and showed it to my friends. They say I should stay blonde. It was conclusive, and I like conclusions. Here's another one.